How it took until the year 2012 for someone to come up with the idea of making taco shells out of Doritos is really just beyond me. That it took until 2013 to also come out with a Cool Ranch Doritos taco blows my mind even further. And that I wasn’t the one to think of all this years ago?? Well I can barely cope with that.

Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Taco

Either way, someone had the idea and thank Doritos-loving heavens they did, because it’s genius. (Seriously, ask the 15,000 people who got jobs at Taco Bell because of all these tacos!)

I, for one, will say it loud and proud: I love Doritos (even if they are practically poisonous). I’d had the original Nachos Doritos Locos Taco (side note Taco Bell, what a stupid name. Why’d they have to be Loco?) last summer but being the Cool Ranch lover that I am, my first question was why only Nacho? I mean, hello, everyone knows Cool Ranch is the far superior flavor (however MSG-laced it might be).

Nachos Doritos Locos Taco

When Taco Bell finally got with it and added Cool Ranch to their Doritos Locos Tacos line up, I was ready to go. And I did. Straight to the depths of Penn Station, where even just breathing the air from the food court will make you fat.

Are these two tacos everything I’ve ever dreamed of? Uhm, no, hardly. But they’re not bad. The Nachos version is a somewhat alarming shade of orange and jam-packed with intense, cheesy Dorito flavor. Inside the crunchy shell is basically the same low-grade Taco Bell filling you’ll find in their other menu items, shredded lettuce, orange cheese and that ground beef that oozes brown juice over everything. The new Cool Ranch taco on the other hand, stuffed with the same ingredients, isn’t as overwhelmingly flavorful or neon-colored, and the shell, with its speckly dusting of seasoning, actually looks like a giant Cool Ranch Dorito.

I think if filled with actual quality ingredients (and maybe eaten after many drinks or a “sneaky puff” or two) these Doritos tacos could be the most incredible idea I never had.